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Ladies & Gentlemen
Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting,
"Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? I get a sinking feeling everytime I hear them at Aldgate. They go off about every 5 seconds, step on the announcements you want to hear, and are so bloody pointless ! "Ladies & Gentlemen, this is a tube station, you can allegedly get a tube home from here." And more, constantly, only less useful :-) -- Edward Cowling London UK |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Edward Cowling London UK" wrote in message ... Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? I get a sinking feeling everytime I hear them at Aldgate. They go off about every 5 seconds, step on the announcements you want to hear, and are so bloody pointless ! "Ladies & Gentlemen, this is a tube station, you can allegedly get a tube home from here." And more, constantly, only less useful :-) ...............Huh???? -- Edward Cowling London UK Hey Eddie, we have fun leaving you all perplexed on the platform by not telling you which train will be first to depart, Circle? Met?.... It's the only giggle we have, and Aldgate is ideal for such antics. What do you suggest I recommend to the Group Station manager of the Aldgate group that announcements should start with? "Good evening suckers"? |
Ladies & Gentlemen
Edward Cowling London UK wrote: Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? I think it is a good idea. Putting some "unimportant" words at the start of an announcement gives people chance to tune in without missing the important content. If the announcement just launches straight in, people miss things. A "bing bong" at the beginning does the same thing (you don't say whether there is a chime or not in this case). PhilD -- |
Ladies & Gentlemen
On 30 Jan 2006 00:14:31 -0800, "PhilD" wrote:
Edward Cowling London UK wrote: Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? I think it is a good idea. Putting some "unimportant" words at the start of an announcement gives people chance to tune in without missing the important content. The problem is that most of the announcements are useless. This means that people will tend to ignore them completely. Certainly every time I hear "this is a special announcement" or "this is a safety announcement", I ignore it, because I know what it's goign to say. -- James Farrar . @gmail.com |
Ladies & Gentlemen
James Farrar wrote:
On 30 Jan 2006 00:14:31 -0800, "PhilD" wrote: Edward Cowling London UK wrote: Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? I think it is a good idea. Putting some "unimportant" words at the start of an announcement gives people chance to tune in without missing the important content. The problem is that most of the announcements are useless. This means that people will tend to ignore them completely. Certainly every time I hear "this is a special announcement" or "this is a safety announcement", I ignore it, because I know what it's goign to say. What about OI YOU LOT at the start of every message or LISTEN TO ME, LISTEN TO ME then lots of flashing lights, the worst thing would be a direct link into the drivers brain (G D & C) and what he's really thinking about the great unwashed.:) I'm off to put my flame proof underpants on;) |
Ladies & Gentlemen
I think it is a good idea. Putting some "unimportant"
words at the start of an announcement gives people chance to tune in without missing the important content. The problem is that most of the announcements are useless. This means that people will tend to ignore them completely. Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples? Matt |
Ladies & Gentlemen
James Farrar wrote:
The problem is that most of the announcements are useless. This means that people will tend to ignore them completely. You want a worse one? At Stratford a lot of routine Underground announcements (e.g. "No Smoking") have an annoying tendency to start playing and cancelling out specific announcements about what stations a train serves. With no destination indicators at the east end of the Ilford bound platform, many people frequently board peak hour trains that don't stop at their station, because the crucial announcement was cut out. |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"www.waspies.net" wrote in message
... James Farrar wrote: On 30 Jan 2006 00:14:31 -0800, "PhilD" wrote: Edward Cowling London UK wrote: Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? I think it is a good idea. Putting some "unimportant" words at the start of an announcement gives people chance to tune in without missing the important content. The problem is that most of the announcements are useless. This means that people will tend to ignore them completely. Certainly every time I hear "this is a special announcement" or "this is a safety announcement", I ignore it, because I know what it's goign to say. What about OI YOU LOT at the start of every message or LISTEN TO ME, LISTEN TO ME then lots of flashing lights, the worst thing would be a direct link into the drivers brain (G D & C) and what he's really thinking about the great unwashed.:) Maybe the announcements should start with a loud "OI YOU ****ERS" quickly followed by a 30-second burst of klaxon, two minutes of screaming babies mixed in with the sounds of a slaughter house, followed by more profanity, and finally "stand behind the yellow line" :-P I'm off to put my flame proof underpants on;) |
Ladies & Gentlemen
What about OI YOU LOT at the start of every message or LISTEN TO ME, LISTEN TO ME then lots of flashing lights, the worst thing would be a direct link into the drivers brain (G D & C) and what he's really thinking about the great unwashed.:) Maybe the announcements should start with a loud "OI YOU ****ERS" quickly followed by a 30-second burst of klaxon, two minutes of screaming babies mixed in with the sounds of a slaughter house, followed by more profanity, and finally "stand behind the yellow line" :-P Sounds good to me, I'm back on the Met tomorrow night, listen out for that one;) |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"www.waspies.net" wrote in message
... What about OI YOU LOT at the start of every message or LISTEN TO ME, LISTEN TO ME then lots of flashing lights, the worst thing would be a direct link into the drivers brain (G D & C) and what he's really thinking about the great unwashed.:) Maybe the announcements should start with a loud "OI YOU ****ERS" quickly followed by a 30-second burst of klaxon, two minutes of screaming babies mixed in with the sounds of a slaughter house, followed by more profanity, and finally "stand behind the yellow line" :-P Sounds good to me, I'm back on the Met tomorrow night, listen out for that one;) hahaha! :) |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In article ,
www.waspies.net wrote: Maybe the announcements should start with a loud "OI YOU ****ERS" quickly followed by a 30-second burst of klaxon, two minutes of screaming babies mixed in with the sounds of a slaughter house, followed by more profanity, and finally "stand behind the yellow line" :-P Sounds good to me, I'm back on the Met tomorrow night, listen out for that one;) I'm sure there's a band who've released that song already. Nick -- So when is Tony Blair going to start treating *us* with respect ? |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Matt Ashby" typed
Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples? 'On leaving the train, please ensure you have all your personal possessions with you.' Has no effect on the terminally scatter-brained AFAICT... -- Helen D. Vecht: Edgware. |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Helen Deborah Vecht" wrote in message
... "Matt Ashby" typed Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples? 'On leaving the train, please ensure you have all your personal possessions with you.' Has no effect on the terminally scatter-brained AFAICT... But would have an effect on someone who isn't scatter-brained, but has left something behind. Just because it doesn't affect you doesn't mean it's useless :) -- Helen D. Vecht: Edgware. |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In message , Helen Deborah
Vecht writes "Matt Ashby" typed Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples? 'On leaving the train, please ensure you have all your personal possessions with you.' Has no effect on the terminally scatter-brained AFAICT... You probably saw that I posted recently about a large part of the front end of a Ford Escort being left on a District Line train (I was told of this on a behind-the-scenes visit to Baker Street a while ago now). The number of umbrellas, gloves and mobile phones there is amazing. Whenever I come to the end of tours, be it for half a day or for several days' duration, I always do an announcement about not leaving things behind which I endeavour to make sound spontaneous and with feeling, rather than just being well, an announcement. But people still leave things, even after they've been told the tale of an incident many years ago now, when someone left behind their artificial foot....... -- Ian Jelf, MITG Birmingham, UK Registered Blue Badge Tourist Guide for London and the Heart of England http://www.bluebadge.demon.co.uk |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Ian Jelf" wrote in message
... In message , Helen Deborah Vecht writes "Matt Ashby" typed Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples? 'On leaving the train, please ensure you have all your personal possessions with you.' Has no effect on the terminally scatter-brained AFAICT... You probably saw that I posted recently about a large part of the front end of a Ford Escort being left on a District Line train (I was told of this on a behind-the-scenes visit to Baker Street a while ago now). The number of umbrellas, gloves and mobile phones there is amazing. Whenever I come to the end of tours, be it for half a day or for several days' duration, I always do an announcement about not leaving things behind which I endeavour to make sound spontaneous and with feeling, rather than just being well, an announcement. But people still leave things, even after they've been told the tale of an incident many years ago now, when someone left behind their artificial foot....... But you never see the items from people who would have left something, but upon hearing the announcement remembered to take their items with them... so it'll always appear, from lost-baggage's perspective, that the announcements don't work :-P -- Ian Jelf, MITG Birmingham, UK Registered Blue Badge Tourist Guide for London and the Heart of England http://www.bluebadge.demon.co.uk |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Edward Cowling London UK" wrote in message ... Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? I get a sinking feeling everytime I hear them at Aldgate. They go off about every 5 seconds, step on the announcements you want to hear, and are so bloody pointless ! "Ladies & Gentlemen, this is a tube station, you can allegedly get a tube home from here." And more, constantly, only less useful :-) -- Edward Cowling London UK I'm doing inner rail circle line runs three evening's this week, I'll be sure to give it "Good evening eddie" when at Aldgate....... |
Ladies & Gentlemen
On Mon, 30 Jan 2006, Nick Leverton wrote:
In article , www.waspies.net wrote: Maybe the announcements should start with a loud "OI YOU ****ERS" quickly followed by a 30-second burst of klaxon, two minutes of screaming babies mixed in with the sounds of a slaughter house, followed by more profanity, and finally "stand behind the yellow line" :-P Sounds good to me, I'm back on the Met tomorrow night, listen out for that one;) I'm sure there's a band who've released that song already. Yes, the Aphex Twin did a whole album like that. tom -- Don't trust the laws of men. Trust the laws of mathematics. |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In article ,
Tom Anderson wrote: On Mon, 30 Jan 2006, Nick Leverton wrote: In article , www.waspies.net wrote: Maybe the announcements should start with a loud "OI YOU ****ERS" quickly followed by a 30-second burst of klaxon, two minutes of screaming babies mixed in with the sounds of a slaughter house, followed by more profanity, and finally "stand behind the yellow line" :-P Sounds good to me, I'm back on the Met tomorrow night, listen out for that one;) I'm sure there's a band who've released that song already. Yes, the Aphex Twin did a whole album like that. Come to Daddy ? Nick -- So when is Tony Blair going to start treating *us* with respect ? |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Matt Ashby" wrote in message
ups.com... Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples? "There is currently a one second pause good one second pause service on the Northern Line". Ian |
Ladies & Gentlemen
On Tue, 31 Jan 2006 08:19:42 -0000, "Ian F."
wrote: "Matt Ashby" wrote in message oups.com... Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples? "There is currently a one second pause good one second pause service on the Northern Line". Ian I agree, useless, especially when the Train Display says next train in 14 mins!!!! |
Ladies & Gentlemen
d ) gurgled happily, sounding much like they were saying :
'On leaving the train, please ensure you have all your personal possessions with you.' Has no effect on the terminally scatter-brained AFAICT... But would have an effect on someone who isn't scatter-brained, but has left something behind. If they're still on the train, then they don't realise that they're about to leave something behind. If they've just left the train, then by the time they DO realise, the train doors are closed and the train is just disappearing into the tunnel... |
Ladies & Gentlemen
Ian F. ) gurgled happily, sounding much like they were
saying : "There is currently a one second pause good one second pause service on the Northern Line". The second pause is needed - for the laughter to die down. |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Adrian" wrote in message . 244.170... Ian F. ) gurgled happily, sounding much like they were saying : "There is currently a one second pause good one second pause service on the Northern Line". The second pause is needed - for the laughter to die down. Adrian stay out of this thread, you're out of your depth. |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Adrian" wrote in message
. 244.170... d ) gurgled happily, sounding much like they were saying : 'On leaving the train, please ensure you have all your personal possessions with you.' Has no effect on the terminally scatter-brained AFAICT... But would have an effect on someone who isn't scatter-brained, but has left something behind. If they're still on the train, then they don't realise that they're about to leave something behind. Sorry - in the process of leaving something behind. As in they are with their soon-to-be-lost property, but have forgotten they have it with them. If they've just left the train, then by the time they DO realise, the train doors are closed and the train is just disappearing into the tunnel... |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Adrian" wrote in message
. 244.170... The second pause is needed - for the laughter to die down. LOL. Ian |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In message . 170,
Adrian writes Ian F. ) gurgled happily, sounding much like they were saying : "There is currently a one second pause good one second pause service on the Northern Line". The second pause is needed - for the laughter to die down. Or the sobbing...... on a bad night :-) -- Edward Cowling London UK |
Ladies & Gentlemen
Ian Jelf wrote: Whenever I come to the end of tours, be it for half a day or for several days' duration, I always do an announcement about not leaving things behind which I endeavour to make sound spontaneous and with feeling, rather than just being well, an announcement. But people still leave things, even after they've been told the tale of an incident many years ago now, when someone left behind their artificial foot....... Thanks. I appreciate it. I have a tendency to leave things behind, especially when things aren't routine. The announcements help. I recently left a much loved scarf on a train (I was very tired and had flu so wasn't thinking). Railways don't handle lost property very well nowadays I'm afraid. Francis |
Ladies & Gentlemen
d wrote:
But you never see the items from people who would have left something, but upon hearing the announcement remembered to take their items with them... so it'll always appear, from lost-baggage's perspective, that the announcements don't work :-P They could test it by not playing the announcement for a month and seeing if the number of left items goes up. Perhaps they have done such a test. -- To contact me take a davidhowdon and add a @yahoo.co.uk to the end. |
Ladies & Gentlemen
"Chris!" wrote in message
oups.com... Or the "The next stop on this train" part on the northen line announcmenents... Whats wrong with the German system "Next stop: Charing Cross" - none of the fake pleasantries At Leicester Square, the announcement used to say (and maybe still does) "The next stop *with* this train is Tottenham Court Road". WTF? Ian |
Ladies & Gentlemen
On Tue, 31 Jan 2006, Nick Leverton wrote:
In article , Tom Anderson wrote: On Mon, 30 Jan 2006, Nick Leverton wrote: In article , www.waspies.net wrote: Maybe the announcements should start with a loud "OI YOU ****ERS" quickly followed by a 30-second burst of klaxon, two minutes of screaming babies mixed in with the sounds of a slaughter house, followed by more profanity, and finally "stand behind the yellow line" :-P Sounds good to me, I'm back on the Met tomorrow night, listen out for that one;) I'm sure there's a band who've released that song already. Yes, the Aphex Twin did a whole album like that. Come to Daddy ? That's an EP, rather than an album, but it fits the bill. Come to think of it, almost all Aphex Twin records fit the bill ... tom -- Who would you help in a fight, Peter van der Linden or Bill Gates? |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In article ,
Tom Anderson wrote: On Tue, 31 Jan 2006, Nick Leverton wrote: Tom Anderson wrote: ...snips.. Yes, the Aphex Twin did a whole album like that. Come to Daddy ? That's an EP, rather than an album, but it fits the bill. Thanks, I assumed otherwise as my copy looks like an album ... well it's got 8 tracks on anyway, only half of which seem to be remixes. I'm not in a strong enough mood to listen to it right now and check ! Come to think of it, almost all Aphex Twin records fit the bill ... He certainly leapt into my mind too :) Nick -- So when is Tony Blair going to start treating *us* with respect ? |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In message .com,
Chris! writes The automatic ones that broadcast over the top of useful announcements the staff are making. E.g. at Earls Court, somone announces "Sorry for the delay this evening, the next Wimbledon train is currently leaving" then is interrupted by "A normal service is operating on the district line" I had that tonight at Aldgate. A ladies and gentlemen there is a good service on all underground lines, stepped on the announcement telling us where the next Hammersmith & City line had got to. I think it turned out that the driver had got lost and decided to be the 18:10 to Amersham instead :-) -- Edward Cowling London UK |
Ladies & Gentlemen
Edward Cowling London UK wrote:
In message .com, Chris! writes [in response to Matt Ashby's "Which announcements do you think are useless? Do you have any examples?] The automatic ones that broadcast over the top of useful announcements the staff are making. E.g. at Earls Court, somone announces "Sorry for the delay this evening, the next Wimbledon train is currently leaving" then is interrupted by "A normal service is operating on the district line" I had that tonight at Aldgate. A ladies and gentlemen there is a good service on all underground lines, stepped on the announcement telling us where the next Hammersmith & City line had got to. I assume you're nominating the H&C announcement as useless, since the H&C doesn't serve Aldgate. -- Richard J. (to e-mail me, swap uk and yon in address) |
Ladies & Gentlemen
But would have an effect on someone who isn't scatter-brained, but has
left something behind. If they're still on the train, then they don't realise that they're about to leave something behind. Sorry - in the process of leaving something behind. As in they are with their soon-to-be-lost property, but have forgotten they have it with them. If they've just left the train, then by the time they DO realise, the train doors are closed and the train is just disappearing into the tunnel... People this dismally stupid go through life in a haze that the witty denizens of Usenet would not even realise as sentience. Watch them stand in front of ticket gates fumbling in their rucksacks. Watch them drop things whilst waiting at cashpoints or checkout queues for no apparent reason I really want a place to get away from these ****wits. Yes I do want to read my book, and yes books are optimised for a slightly longer attention span than the Metro is; do people get bored upon finding their phones don't work underground and they need some waffle to listen to? |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In message , Tim
writes I really want a place to get away from these ****wits. Yes I do want to read my book, and yes books are optimised for a slightly longer attention span than the Metro is; do people get bored upon finding their phones don't work underground and they need some waffle to listen to? Oh dear, hide the sharp objects ! -- Edward Cowling London UK |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In message , Richard J.
writes A ladies and gentlemen there is a good service on all underground lines, stepped on the announcement telling us where the next Hammersmith & City line had got to. I assume you're nominating the H&C announcement as useless, since the H&C doesn't serve Aldgate. Sorry Aldgate East. Not to be confused with Aldgate which is next door :-) Or did the train decide to be the 18:23 to St Neots ? :-) -- Edward Cowling London UK |
Ladies & Gentlemen
On Sun, 29 Jan 2006 23:36:51 +0000, Edward Cowling London UK
wrote: Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? Tim O'Toole, the Tube's MD. Rob. -- rob at robertwoolley dot co dot uk |
Ladies & Gentlemen
In message , Robert Woolley
writes On Sun, 29 Jan 2006 23:36:51 +0000, Edward Cowling London UK wrote: Who on earth thought the new tube announcements starting, "Ladies & Gentlemen," were a good idea ? Tim O'Toole, the Tube's MD. Ahh. It's now starting to sound like the introduction to a music hall act. Like the guy who did Leeds City Varieties. "Ladies & Gentlemen, tonight for your transportational functionality, we have pleasure in giving you......Terry driving the 18:10 to Hammersmith." -- Edward Cowling London UK |
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